Dear Sheila:

How horrible it must have been for you to be on the phone with her at the time.  I just returned from a suicide prevention meeting, so I do have some insight into what was going on with her when she committed suicide.  First, let me assure you that if she loved the Lord, she is with Him.  Second, you need to know that no one commits suicide without being in a state of depression and not thinking clearly.  We have a very caring and compassionate God, who would never judge us or kick us when we are down.  He's just not that kind of God.  So, yes I do believe she is with Jesus if she had a relationship with Him, and NO, I don't believe that you automatically go to hell because you commit suicide.

God is the giver of life, but not the only taker of life.  Sometimes people take their own lives, out of His timing.  Also, sometimes people are murdered.  Do you think a loving God would send a murderer to take someones life, when it would hurt so many including the one doing the murdering.  There is a devil, and the Bible says he is like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour.  He wants to kill us; especially Christians.

As to you mom coming and visiting your dad, let me assure you it is not your mom.  There is a thing called famiiiar spirits.  Basically they are demons posing as a recently deceased person.  One way to tell, is there is almost always fear assocaited with it.  Second, the Bible clearly says that that doesn't happen.  When we die, we go to be with the Lord or to hell.  We don't float around the area for awhile.  Lighting a candle does nothing for the dead.  It sometimes helps us to cope with our grief though.

Lastly, you did nothing wrong.  Don't blame yourself.  She had already decided to do it, there was nothing you could have said to stop her.  Remember she was not in her right mind at the time.

You need to move on with the peace that she is with the Lord. We are not the judge of who is in heaven and who is not.  Only God knows for sure.  So trust in who you know she was, and rest in that.

Pastor Dave
sheila <sheilaAjackson@hotmail.com> wrote:

Thank you so very much for answering me and not charging me. The reason I feel she is trapped is because she keeps going to my dad and waking him in sleep. She says his name. My mother was a righteous woman. She taught me about the Lord from a child. I myself am a living miracle ( as everything is) but I was 3 months premature in 1970 and was told I wasn’t going to live and if I did I would be "special" to be kind of words. I cant help but feel she is trapped, like you said I know to be absent of the body is to be with the Lord. Why did she come to my dad and ask him to light a white candle for her? Doesn’t that mean she needs help finding her way? Thank you so very much for helping me. God Bless you. My mother was a beautiful woman and being tormented on so many levels. I was on the phone with her when she shot herself and she told me she was going to be with Jesus. So I need to have the faith that she is there. Right? I hurt so bad inside , I miss her so very much. I just wish I could have helped her. I hope and pray she watches over me and my daughter. We loved her so very much. So , do you believe she is with Jesus? Id love your personal opinion. Do you believe suicide sends us to hell? Even If we are Christian when we commit the act. I have attempted suicide myself and I do have to say, it is very very peaceful, but we are taught that only God can give life and it is up to him to take it away. So it was his will that she went that day and in that way. I know im rambling, I just want peace for her and for my family.

Thank you so very much for taking up time with me and for not charging me.

God Bless you Dave.

Sheila Jackson